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aggressive 19 month old Rss

My wee girl has always been physical. Lately she has started running over to hit me when I say no to anything. Today at a birthday party the 1 year old came over for her food and she pushed him over. Then pulled a little girl over twice. We've started using time out and saying no hitting. Hitting hurts. I felt so ashamed today. I left the party and cried all the way home. Is this normal? Anyone out there dealing with this too? Just looking for some reassurance.
Some kids just are more inclined to behave physically; I think you've made the right choice with a non-physical consequence rather than e.g. a smack (which would reinforce that its an acceptable, normal behaviour). I'm sure other mums will understand; hopefully as she gets older and understands more, it'll become easier for you!
My little guy started doing the same thing at around that age and I was ashamed, embarrassed and I left Playgroup in tears more than once. Like yourself, I looked into it a fair bit at the time and discovered that it is actually quite normal. It's a combination of a lack of language ability but they also don't have the cognitive development to understand why people and things aren't exactly the way they want them to be. It's a very egocentric age.
My approach has always been to hold my little ones hands, look him in the eyes and let him know that hands are not for hitting, mummy is not for hitting, we don't push our friends ... etc etc. I always try to remain calm and show sympathy to any other children caught in the crossfire (an apologised to their parents). There is no point getting angry with them because it's all part of the learning process. They're not being naughty, they're actually acting in an age appropriate way that requires us to guide them and teach them what is acceptable.
My son is now 2.5 years old and he does still occasionally hit out at myself and other kids but things have improved dramatically. I find that it happens most when he is getting tired these days whereas initially it was as soon as any other child dared to enter his personal space.
Hang in there, mate. Even knowing it's normal didn't really help to relieve my embarrassment when this happened but it helped to know that there wasn't something wrong with my little guy and that, with guidance, it would eventually pass.
Good luck x
My son is 19mths and if he hits me or does something wrong I tell him no, he usually starts to cry and reaches for a cuddle. I don't want to encourage the behaviour by hugging him when he's done something wrong so I sit him on the floor in front of me and tell him when he has calmed down he will get a cuddle. When it's all done I tell him what he has done wrong and ALWAYS use the exact same words each time it happens so he eventually realises which words go with which actions, so he can choose between doing a good thing or a bad thing. Lots of praise for good things is a must so don't let the bad overwhelm the good.
My son occasionally may hit either my husband or me. Every time he does this, I try to explain to him that this behaviour is unacceptable. I'm sure he has no idea of what acceptable is, but you have to start somewhere. Also, every time he does this I would ask him why did you do this. HIs answer was always 'I don't know', always, up until recently when he started responding with 'I'm playing'.

This is not much, but I still consider it as the improvement. Now, I need to keep talking that playing in such a way is still unacceptable. My point, you have to do a lot of talking. Eventually, all this talk will get to your bub's head, just be patient.
My little one who is nearly 2 used to and still does occasionally do the same thing,
It is a very delicate time. Children always try to test their parents. See how far they can take us. We do not want to think that our children can become conniving. And when children actually start to do this, we must understand that it is not coming from an innocent place and remember to speak about it sternly. If it is off limits, then it must be clearly communicated, with reasons and all. It should be treated sensitively. Any encouragement will be received well. So positive reinforcements for the tiny observations you make during that conversation will steer the child into understanding the depth of his/her act.
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