Caesarians

Ok so I'm having a ceasaren with this baby and I'm having a rough time with the idea. I'm not sure what I'll feel like afterwards and I know I'll really want to concentrate on bonding and breastfeeding, because I had so much trouble last time. So I have requested no visitors until the next day. Everyone seems to be really cranky about it and apparently my mum said to one of my sisters "Well, there's not much she can do if we all just show up!"
I know everyone will be excited and I will of course let everyone know by calling and stuff, but am I really being horrible by asking that they wait till the next morning to come and visit?
[Edited on 09/01/2009 by Huggies_Moderator]
[Edited on 09/01/2009 by Huggies_Moderator]

No you're definately not being unreasonable. It's hard work having a baby and they should respect your wishes and wait until the next day to see bub. If they just turn up when you have asked them to wait then they are rude.
[Edited on 10/01/2009 by Huggies_Moderator]

Nope I don't think so. You need to do what feels right for you and if having no visitors until the next day is what you need to recover a bit and get started bonding and breastfeeding, then EVERYONE should respect your wishes....and that includes your mum. You can inform all the nurses that you don't want visitors until the next day and they can be the ones to tell everyone to go away. Make sure you have it written up in your file too.

No you're not being a b*tch - you are having major abdominal surgery and it is your right to request no visitors.

I'd not tell anyone what room you are in after the birth, and then be telling the staff on the ward to tell people who are visiting you that you are not up for visitors, and they they would be welcome to pop in tomorrow...

Let the staff be the bad guys...

I don't think you are being a b!tch. I had a ceasaren and we didn't get visitors until the next day either (just by chance I think!!). It was great to have just one on one time with new bub and DH and as you said concentrate on breastfeeding (I struggled as well!)

You family and friends need to respect your decision and understand that you need that time to yourself.

Nope , I had a c-section with my 2nd and asked that everyone stay away until the next day! they all respected my wishes and stayed away! Maybe you could stress to the Midwives that there are to be no visitors also. Good Luck and don't let them walk over you smile

No i think thats reasonable. I did the same with dd. i didnt want anyone to know i was in labour. With ds they all rocked up to the hossy during labour and i was taken to surgery due to complications so basically all my family got to cuddle ds before i did.

dd was born at 3pm and i was in labour ward until 10pm to be monitored in case of repeat complications so couldnt have visitors until the next day anyway.

Make sure you tell staff no visitors and they are usually pretty good at keeping people away. Could you tell them the wrong date for the cs? Then just ring them and say 'hey suprise' the next day?

No way, just make sure no body knows ur room number so if they do turn up they have to ask at the desk and it should be on ur file that there are to be no visitors. The staff can just tell them not today.

definitely not.
if they know when you are booked in, tell them the Doc changed it. can't turn up if they don't know you are there!

Hi there.
When we had our DS1 all our family was in the waiting room - not that this was how it was planned, more just a case of how it turned out. I felt under a huge amount of pressure - fighting families and all that stuff!!

So, when DS2 was due we told all family that we weren't having anyone there.

Long story short, it ended in emergency c section. Epidural took about 13 hours to dissappear and I REFUSED to have any visitors bar hubby and DS1 for the first day. I felt like a failure not being able to have the baby on my own and everytime I saw/spoke to anyone I cried and cried.

I don't think there is anything wrong with saying you don't want visitors.
Ask them to let you bond with your baby, let you recover from a fairly traumatic operation and to "please respect your wishes" without taking offense and making the birth any harder than it already will be for you.
It is only one day after all - and they can help you out for a lifetime!! If you are lucky that is!!

Good luck. I hope they can understand in the long run.

NO!
You are NOT being a b itch! Stick to your guns!

When I was having DD1 my mum said she will be at the hossy whilst I am in labour (I was in melb - 2hrs away- with DS) and I said NO you won;t be, it will be me & DH no one else, she said you can't stopme , I said yes I can when I don;t call you to tell you I am in labour!

She then said she will over as soon as bubs is born but as I had had a traumatic birth with DS and he was taken beofre I could hold & feed him etc I wanted some time with bubs as it was a whole new experience for me and I wanted to concentrate on feeding, I ended up tealling her that if she did not respect my wishes I would simply not ring her when bubs is born and she can find out when I am ready for visitors!

She got the hint and as it turned out she was looking after DS anyway but I still think she was put out as we asked her to bring him to the hossy then just give us 20mins alone with him and bubs before actually visiting!

They have a whole lifetime to meet and bond with bubs, one day will not hurt, I would also be telling the nurses that you DO NOT want visitors and if you do decide to let them in ask a nurse to come and ask them to leave afetr a certain amount of time.

Good Luck and remeber this is YOUR baby, you can decide who visits and when!

No you are not being a bitch, they are the ones being horrible. This is your baby and you are the one having the surgery so they can all go and get ........ I had no visitors for the first day and I asked the nurses to tell anyone that came to the hospital that day that I was not up for visitors, no one did show up though. Also the hospital I went to gave me a sign to put up on my door that said
no visitors.